Wednesday, October 24, 2018

Over The Cubicle Chronicles: Next Station, Metro Center







Brooke's grown tired of the craziness of driving to work; the traffic and trying to find a parking space when she gets there. Now she's opted for a different kind of crazy, riding the Metro's Green line.



Jeffrey was standing in the office's kitchenette when Brooke arrived.


"Good morning Brooke."

"Good morning Jeffrey."


Jeffrey looked down at Brooke's tummy area.


"So you're missing motherhood and decided to wear your back pack on the front, or you just starting a new fashion trend?"


They both walk back towards their cubicles as Brooke begins to explain.


"I was on the train the other day and some kid was unzipping this man's back pack as he was going down the escalator. From that point on this baby is going in the front."


They both sit down in Brooke's cube as she continues.


"And this morning, I sit down next to a nice looking young lady and speak, "Good Morning," but when she spoke back it was like a green fog of garbage stench coming out of her mouth."


"Damn, did you get up?"


"Heck no, the train was packed and I wasn't about to stand all the way to Metro Center. But the worst part of it was she kept yawning and that green fog kept coming my way."


"What did it smell like?"  Jeffrey asked.


"It smelled like, butt, onions, and last night's dinner. So I just buried my nose in to my back pack until I got to my stop."


"Oh my God, I just can't even imagine."


Jeffrey takes a sip of his tea and Brooke puts her back pack on her desk.


"And that's not the worst of it.  It was some kids on there playing loud ass music at 6:30 in the morning.  One of the girls had her leg wrapped around the pole like her name was Poison Ivy straight out of a strip club and one of the dudes was hanging from the pole doing pull ups."


Jeffrey blew on his tea as he leaned forward.


"Then one lady said, "No one wants to hear that kind of language first thing in the morning." Then he says back to her "And no one wants to look at that ugly ass wig you're wearing!"


Jeffrey clutched his bow tie as if they were pearls.



"Then what happened?"



"I thanked the Heavenly Father that it was my stop. And as I got off the train I tossed her a mint, and to the bunch of them in that car I yelled "Not my zoo, not my monkeys and have a great day!"





Metro Center, Doors Opening On The Left......


















Wednesday, October 17, 2018

Over The Cubicle Chronicles: One Emoji, Two Emojis, Three.....











Jeffrey is well in to his relationship with Ian and he is so sure that it's serious and going somewhere fast. Then suddenly he hears the screech of brakes.


"Hey Brooke"


"Yes Jeffrey"


"Listen to this sh*t."


Jeffrey as usual heads over to Brooke's cube to sit in her counseling chair

"What happened now?"


"Well you know that Mister Man and I have been going full steam ahead, and now suddenly it's slow motion."


Brooke didn't even turn away from her monitor to face Jeffrey

"Didn't you tell me that this man is opening up two gyms in the city and is still meeting with his clients?"

Jeffrey is so unbothered by Brooke's response


"Well yeah, but listen to this...  He used to text me every morning with a cute Emoji and now I'm not even getting "Good Morning," I'm getting "GM," who does that?"


Brooke is still facing her monitor and putting items in her Amazon cart and is oblivious to Jeffrey's whining


"Then during the day he would send me the cutest Emojis saying he was thinking 'bout me, and...."


Brooke is deciding between a black maxi cowl neck or a turquoise sweater dress


"Um hm, I'm listening."


She clearly is not


"So you know I called him out on it. First you send me four Emojis a day and now we're down to maybe two.  No one and I mean no one puts baby in a corner!"



"Um hm, I'm listening."




And again, she clearly is not


"Then boyfriend says to me "I've been renovating two gyms, moving equipment, installing T.V.s, interviewing clients and trainers, ordering equipment, dealing with plumbing issues, and I broke two fingers on some weights and my finger nail is hanging on by duct tape, and you're talking to me about an Emoji!" 


Jeffrey responds to Ian

"Well, since you put it that way."


Brooke finally turns around to face Jeffrey and looks at him over her glasses
and says

"Well I guess he put baby in a corner and stuck a pacifier in his mouth!"


"But for real that's only three fingers that don't work; that leaves seven good ones. Send me my damn Emojis!"


They both fall out laughing!

"Boy get out of my cube!"
















Wednesday, October 10, 2018

Over The Cubicle Chronicles: BodyCon





Lately Brooke has been wearing dresses and skirts that show her curves and it hasn't gone unnoticed by Jeffrey.


"Girl, that dress is giving me life! I don't remember you having that booty last year."


Brooke gives Jeffrey an over the shoulder look while poking out her toosh.


"BodyCon Boo on Amazon."


"BodyCon?" asks Jeffrey.


"Yes, BodyCon and a few moves I've been working on."


Brooke demonstrates a combination of moves that
include twerking and squats


"Wow Brooke, you think you can show me how to do that?"


Brooke walks away...


"Boy put a sock in it!"


Jeffrey puts his hands in his front pockets


"I already do that, I need to work on the back!"













Wednesday, October 3, 2018

Over The Cubicle Chronicles: Who is Really In Charge?





Brooke and Jeffrey have been unsupervised for a few days now. Brooke is acting in her supervisor's stead and Jeffrey has been just acting, acting a damn fool!


"Hey Brooke"


"What Jeffrey?"


"It's my day to leave early."


"I thought yesterday was your day to leave early."


"Well, no yesterday was my day to come in late."


"Boy, I can't keep up with your damn schedule."


Jeffrey hears Brooke gathering her things.


"Where you going Brooke?"


"I have an important meeting on the Mezzanine at 1pm."


Jeffrey steps out of his cube just as Brooke steps out of hers.


"We don't have a Mezzanine."


"I know, it's on the Mezzanine at Mazza Gallerie with my massage therapist. I put it on the schedule as a Work-Life-Balance Symposium. Ain't it great to be in charge? See Ya!"